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Post by Noora on Apr 8, 2006 20:42:15 GMT 10
It's very well written indeed. Love it <3 It made me laugh and almost cry "Even when she smiled there was a cloud in her brown eyes, as if she were waiting for something to crashing down." Your style to write is so beautiful! The hole story is so beautiful!
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Post by larue on Apr 9, 2006 0:49:05 GMT 10
Carter shook his head as he watched Luka tease the soccer ball with his foot and kick it past the young boys trying to get it from him. He glanced around and grinned as he saw her sitting in the sparse shade of a huge bush. He should have known. They were never too far away from one another. She seemed to have one eye on Luka and the other on the three little girls in front of her who were weaving a basket out of dried grasses. She looked up at him from under the folded brim of her hat as he approached.
“Hey,” he said as he squatted down in the dust next to her. “I don’t know how he can move like that in this heat.” Abby chuckled and indicated her own position in the shade.
“You’re asking me?” Carter grinned. They watched the impromptu soccer game in silence and Carter sighed.
“Seems kind of unfair, doesn’t it?” he said quietly. “All these kids... no homes...no real schools...” Abby glanced at him with a frown that soon faded. She knew he was talking about their own sons.....who would have had everything. She’d had that thought herself. Too many times in the last few weeks.
“You two seem to be handling things okay,” he said. Abby shrugged.
“Maybe...here,” she said. Her eyes met his. “It will be harder in Chicago. We still have a nursery to dismantle. Lots of memories at the hospital.” Carter nodded.
“Chicago...” he mused. “ County seems like a world away,” Abby scoffed.
“I hate to break it to you, Carter, “ she said. ‘We’re in Africa? In the middle of the desert? County General is a world away?” He laughed and nodded. They both looked up as they heard the sudden crack of gun fire. One of the little boys kicking the ball crumpled to the dirt. Carter instinctively shoved her back against the bush and huddled to the ground. There was another crack and another child fell. And then another. Screams came from the grass huts nearby as people emerged fromthem and ran toward the open field.
“Get down!” Luka hollered in Arabic as he fell to the ground himself and began creeping toward the injured boys. The dirt directly in front of his facekicked as another bullet narrowly missed him. Luka threw his arms around his head.
“Snipers,” Carter whispered as he turned back to her. Abby had gathered the three little girls in her arms. Her terrified eyes were locked on Luka. “Stay here.” Carter carefully laid himself flat on the ground and snaked silently across the packed dirt. The boys were all flat and silent. Luka lifted his head and more shots rang out. The soccer ball was kicked into the air by a bullet and then destroyed by the volley that followed. There was a shout and then they heard horses riding away. Luka lifted his head cautiously and then sprang to his knees. He crawled to the bleeding boys and felt for a pulse on each of them. Carter was at his side in an instant to help. Abby stood up and ushered the little girls quickly toward their screaming families. She turned back to see Luka drop back on his haunches in the dirt and hang his head. The bodies were picked up and carried away, the gathered crowd moving with them and he was left alone surrounded by puddles of blood. Abby watched him for a moment as he stood up and brushed the dust from his pants. Kind of a futile motion really, but she knew he was buying himself some time to absorb what had happened so quickly. She crossed her arms and waited in the sun for him to come to her. When he was near she looked up at him. Luka didn’t smile as he pulled her close and held her for a long moment.
“It’s not your fault, Luka,” she said finally.
“I shouldn’t have brought them away from the center of the camp,” he said. Abby was still and then she sighed.
“There was no where else to play. They needed to play.”
“But did they need to be killed?” Luka was quiet as they walked among the tent shelters toward the clinic compound. His arm was looped across her shoulders and Abby’s arm circled his waist.
John Carter leaned against the tent pole of the temporary hospital and watched them walk slowly in his direction. He couldn’t explain the feelings he was dealing with. Was it jealousy? He had to admit that she was still in his head. Lord, she was beautiful. Sweaty and dust covered with that crazy khaki bucket hat on her head, his heart caught in his throat whenever he saw her. Here, in this place, with everything that had happened between them so far gone, he wondered what could have been with them had they stuck it out and stayed together. What she would have been like. What he would have been like. Carter shook his head again. Hell, he was the one that broke it off between them, and it hadn’t been pretty. He knew he would hurt her when he wrote the letter. And he’d wanted to hurt her then. He’d wanted to hurt someone...anyone... because he’d felt so alone. Abby was just in the way. Losing her to Luka was a fitting punishment for him. He couldn’t hate either of them for being happy. He’d driven them together...or at least cleared the way for the inevitable.
It was funny how these things played out. They had gone through the same thing...the loss of a child. And with Abby it had been even more devastating. At least he and Kem could have more children when they were ready. He hadn’t known what to say to them about that. But then found it best to say nothing at all. He didn’t understand how what they’d been through could have brought Abby and Luka closer together when it had driven a wedge between him and Kem. It had been months since anything but emails had passed between the two of them. And here Abby had followed Luka to Africa. Abby, whose penchant for long, hot baths and fresh, hot coffee were well documented, had actually chosen to follow him to a place where tepid showers and a good brew were a rare commodity. Luka Kovac was a lucky, lucky man. Carter sighed as they came nearer and tried to smile. They would be gone soon. He would miss them but, in many ways, it would be easier to have them gone. He wouldn’t have to think about what could have been.
It was night. Luka was stretched out on his cot with his arms folded behind his head. He played the scene from the morning out over and over in his mind. What had he missed? Why hadn’t they heard - or felt - the horses? How could he have asked Abby to come here? What if it had been her in the middle of that field. He couldn’t bear the thought of that. He couldn’t reconcile with the fact that three children had died today either. All because he’d wanted them to play. Luka turned his head toward the pillow next to him and was surprised to see that she was still awake. They had both been busy in the clinic for the rest of the day. New babies born, dysentery...one patient after another. It had been exhausting. Yet here she was, lying on her side watching him. Her eyes shone sadly in the light from the moon overhead. The tent tarp that covered the roof of their room couldn’t block out the light. Luka turned on his side and looked at her. He lifted his hand to her face and drew his thumb over her features, tracing the lines of her jaw, her lips, her chin. Abby’s eyes never left his face.
“And I should have paid more attention to what was happening to me...and to Joe,” she said quietly. “I should have gone right to Coburn after I fell instead of ...” Luka pressed a finger to her lips and then closed his eyes. He opened them again and tried to smile.
“It wasn’t your fault,” he said quietly. “You’re a good doctor, Abby. You did what you had to do at that moment. It won’t change anything if we try to blame ourselves.” He drew her closer and held her in his arms. Abby sighed and snuggled against his chest. Luka held her until she drifted to sleep. He had barely closed his own eyes when there was a knock and the door to their room opened.
“Dr. Luka...Dr. Luka...,” came a frantic whisper. Luka opened his eyes and pulled himself up.
“Dr. John sent me to tell you,” Adam Muhammad said. “We are being evacuated. He is at the clinic packing medicines and the first aid kits.” Luka nodded and shook Abby awake.
“Abby,” he said. “We’ve go to go. We have to evacuate.” Her eyes opened with a start and she sat up. Luka was pulling his slacks on and tossed her clothes to her.
“I’m going to help at the clinic,” he said. “Stay here and put as much food and water as you can into our bags” She nodded and grabbed the duffle bags as he kissed her quickly and ran from the room. She went to the common room and emptied the contents of the cupboards into the bags. She dragged them outside just as a jeep pulled up. Adam helped her lift the bags into the back of the jeep. She climbed in and he pulled the jeep toward the clinic doors. Luka and Carter were waiting. They piled boxes into the jeep as other relief workers filled a truck in front of them. Carter went to the truck and was shouting orders to the aides in French. Abby looked around her, wide eyed. People were already filling the road out of the refugee camp...walking hurriedly and silently away on foot...with their belongings in their arms or on bundles on their heads. Luka climbed into jeep beside her. It was still night.
“Tata’s sculpture...” Abby said suddenly. “I forgot it!” Luka looked at her and then pulled himself up.
“I’ll get it,” he said as he jumped out of the jeep.
“Luka!” Carter cried as he moved to get in.
“Get her out of here,” Luka said as he started running toward the doctors’ quarters. “I’ll be on the truck right behind you. Don’t wait for me.”
“Luka...no!” Abby called frantically as she stood up in the back of the jeep. Luka just waved and disappeared in the dust. Carter contemplated what to do. He nodded at Adam and the jeep pulled into the road and honked to warn people to move away.
“Carter! Wait for him!” she cried as she fell back into her seat.
“He said to go, Abby,” Carter said firmly. “He’ll be on the truck.” She turned around in her seat and watched the hospital compound fade as the jeep bumped along the road.
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Post by Lubyfanatic316 on Apr 9, 2006 1:16:35 GMT 10
Awsome update! I can't wait for more.
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Post by sammiejm on Apr 9, 2006 2:45:43 GMT 10
Amazing update, but why have I got the feeling this is going to make me cry before long? I already have a lump in my throat. Keep going though, I can bear the tears if it means I get to read another fantastic installment.
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Post by lubyfan on Apr 9, 2006 22:35:39 GMT 10
You need to update soon, it's really good.
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Post by larue on Apr 10, 2006 2:57:39 GMT 10
Abby checked the saline drips and the IVs on the four little girls that were sharing the two beds on either side of her. She sat back on her stool and smiled as she rubbed one back at a time and brushed away the ever present flies. She looked up as Carter approached and her face fell as he shook his head. It had been 36 hours since they’d arrived at this refugee compound, forty since they left the other one. There was still no word about Luka.
The truck had arrived about an hour after them and Luka was not with them. They hadn’t known to wait for him so they’d left. Left him behind. Abby was frantic when she found out. It was all Carter could do to keep her from taking a jeep and going out to look for him herself. Instead he pulled her into the hospital. With the influx of new refugees pouring in, they were needed.
“How are they doing?” he asked quietly. Abby shrugged.
“They’re dehydrated,” she said. “Obviously. They don’t know how long they have been walking. How old are they, Carter? Five...maybe six years old?” She shook her head and brushed another fly away.
“At least they made it here before they were raped,” he said. She looked up at him and he nodded slowly.
“That’s what I’ve been doing, “ he said. “These people are vicious, Abby. That’s why you need to go.” She frowned.
“I told you before,” she said. “I’m not leaving without Luka.”
“You may not have a choice. Your passport...”
“My passport is fine,” she said. She turned back to the girls on the bed. John studied her for a moment and shook his head. She was so stubborn. Relief workers were leaving by the plane load. They were either headed home or to other, less volatile, locations. His gut feeling told him to get her on a plane to Chicago. His heart told him to get her out of here...to safety.
“I could talk to someone about your passport, you know,” he said. ‘I could have it revoked.” Abby stood up so quickly that the stool over turned and clattered to the floor.
“And you wouldn’t do that, would you?” she said, her brown eyes smoldering with anger. John shook his head in frustration.
“If you were my wife...” he started.
“I’m not,” she said. “And I never will be. You had your chance once so stop with all these...bizarre...fantasies that you’ve been having.” She turned and stalked away from him. John was stunned. Was it that obvious? How could she have possibly known? Even while they were on the jeep his first concern was how he would protect her. Take care of her. Rescue her. Then when they’d learned that Luka hadn’t made it onto the truck they became even more intense. He wanted to put her in a shell somewhere until he was ready to take Luka’s place. He imagined them together in Paris...in Chicago...back here... working side by side...like she’d done with Luka. They had an unspoken harmony with one another. He wanted that as well. And with her again. John looked around the crowded hospital ward and sighed heavily. She was right. He had had his chance.
Abby made her way through the crowded hospital corridors and found the front doors. This camp had been in place longer and was bigger. The hospital facilities were more permanent than where they had been. She had actually been able to take a shower...and try to sleep. That hadn’t been easy. She’d thought about going out looking for him. Then she realized that if he were looking for her it would be easier to be found if she stayed in one place. And she knew he was looking for her.
Abby was surprised to find the bench beside the hospital’s entrance empty. Usually people were lined up at the doors waiting to be seen. She folded her arms across her chest and leaned back against the rough building wall. She watched the people passing in front of her but she wasn’t seeing them. She was seeing him.
She saw the Luka of their very first kiss in the ambulance bay...the Luka of their first date and his laughing frustration at not being able to master the foosball game...the Luka who galloped around the bases on a foul ball...the Luka who loved to tease her and cook for her...the Luka that was so patient with her... that cried with her when their son was born too early and then died...the Luka who took her hand and begged her to marry him and come here...so they could heal together. She looked up as Carter held out a bottle of water. She sighed and took it from him.
“It’s always been Luka, hasn’t it?” he asked as he sat next to her on the bench. She shrugged as she opened the bottle and took a drink.
“I don’t know,” she said. “There was a brief moment in time when I thought it was you.” Carter laughed.
“Brief?” he said. “More like fleeting...” She looked at him and smiled carefully.
“It was more than that, John, and you know it.” Carter looked at her for a moment and then nodded. He opened his own bottle of water and took a drink. He screwed the cap back on before he spoke.
“Think we could have made it, Abby? You and I?” She didn’t respond. He sighed and stood up.
“You need to get out of here,” he said. “You need to go home.”
“I’m not going without my husband,” she said calmly as she tossed the water bottle back and forth from one hand to the other. Carter shook his head in angry frustration.
“Do you think that I wouldn’t bring him back to you?” he cried. “I did it once before.” She looked up at him for a long moment and then swallowed.
“I’m going for a walk,” she said as she stood up and headed down the short pathway to the trodden street. John watched her go and shook his head.
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Post by lubyfan on Apr 10, 2006 4:17:41 GMT 10
I love it! It's so well written! Can't wait to read what happened to Luka.
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Post by zelda on Apr 10, 2006 6:21:57 GMT 10
Amazing stuff.Each character is written so beautifully.Abby is both so strong and fragile.Even Carter is likeable, he wasted his life and he is totally aware of it. It's one of the best fic I have ever read.All these descriptions of the atrocities of war in Africa are so REAL!I feel like I'm living this!The smells, the noises,the bullets make a setting which is more important than the characters themselves.It's difficult to see the difference between fiction and reality. That's fascinating!
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Post by dancergurl18 on Apr 10, 2006 7:05:44 GMT 10
What a great fic! It's so beautifully written. You have truly mastered the emotions of the whole situation. Carter's feelings for Abby, and Abby's feeling because of this. Not to mention Abby and Luka's feeling towards eachother after all they have been through. You had me crying at the begininning there. Anyway... I have really enjoyed this so far and am looking forward to more.
Franny XX
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Post by larue on Apr 10, 2006 7:40:23 GMT 10
Thank yo SO much for your reviews!!! I am glad you are liking this story. Writing it has become an obsession.....
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Post by <3 LubyII <3 on Apr 10, 2006 10:04:05 GMT 10
Post more soon, PLZ!!!
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Post by Lubyfanatic316 on Apr 10, 2006 10:13:36 GMT 10
Love the update. Can't wait for more!
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Post by dancergurl18 on Apr 10, 2006 12:40:36 GMT 10
Well... if it is an obsession, I'm sure you would have no trouble updating.
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Post by larue on Apr 10, 2006 15:51:24 GMT 10
She tried to get some sleep. She really did. Debbie had wanted her to take some sleeping pills but Abby had refused. It was medication they’d need for someone else. She wandered through the wards and helped out when she could. She finally managed to rest when she sat in a dilapidated rocker with feverish baby in her lap. She fell asleep amidst a tangle of IV lines. The nurses were so happy to see both of them finally sleeping that they left her there until morning.
There was still no information about Luka. Officials from the L’Alliance sent word that the area they had been had been over run by militant raiders. The area was still too volatile to send someone in search of any survivors. Abby showered and changed into some borrowed scrubs. She washed her own clothes in the bathroom sink and hung them on the clothesline in the sun of the staff’s private courtyard to dry.
“Dr. Lockhart.” Abby turned as she hung the last of her laundry on the line.
“It’s Kovac,” she corrected. “‘Dr. Kovac.” The French aide looked in confusion at the plastic pocket with her identification papers that Abby wore around her neck.
“We were married in Croatia before we arrived in Sudan,” she explained. “There wasn’t time to change my passport.” The aide nodded.
“Dr. Carter sent me to find you,” she said. They need you in the clinic.” Abby sighed and nodded. She knew what that meant. Carter had his hands full with female patients. They didn’t like being examined by a male doctor. Abby had learned from the beginning that her mere presence was highly regarded...and needed.
She could hear the screams long before she reached the doors of the clinic. She hurried into the nearest exam room and stopped. Carter was trying to staunch the bleeding of a young girl. He looked up as Abby stepped inside the curtains.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I know you have other things on your mind but...”
“Go...” she ordered as she pulled on a pair of gloves and pressed her hands over his. “Go on...leave...” Carter nodded an pulled his hands out from under her’s and left the exam room. Abby lifted the gauze pad and winced as she saw the deep machete cuts that crossed both of the girl’s thighs. She nodded toward the nurse who had inserted an IV line into the girl’s restrained left arm. The nurse took her place with the new gauze sponges replacing the soaked pads and Abby moved up to the girl’s head.
“Has she had morphine yet?” The nurse nodded.
“I just pushed it.”
“Hey...,” Abby said softly as she pressed her stethoscope to the girl’s chest. “It’s okay...it’s okay...” Her voice was soft and soothing and the girl slowly stopped writhing and screaming. Her large, terrified eyes rested on Abby’s face. Abby smiled sympathetically and rubbed the girl’s cheek.
“We’re going to take care of you,” she said. “It’s okay...” It was only a moment before the girl lapsed into a deep sleep as the medication she had received kicked in.
“Abby?” Carter said from the other side of the curtain.
“She’s out,” Abby said. Carter came in with several suture kits in his hands.
“Do you think we can do this here?” she asked. He nodded.
“We’re going to have to,” he said. “Surgeons are all tied up. There was an attack on a village close by.” They worked in companionable silence as they used a multitude of layered stitches to close the girl’s wounds. More than once Carter looked up to watch her face for a second or two. She was serious and absorbed in her work.
“There’s really no hope for her here now, is there?”
“What do you mean?” Carter said as he held up the suture needle for the nurse to clip the self absorbing thread close. He bent to take another stitch.
“What is she? Maybe twelve? She’s been raped...these cuts will be a reminder of that forever. She’ll never get a husband with these scars. No family. No schools to attend... There’s no hope.” Carter looked up at her curiously.
“She won’t be alone...unfortunately, “ he said. Abby arched her back and sighed.
“Ready to go home?” Carter asked. Abby rolled her eyes and glared at him. He shrugged.
“Ehh...I thought it was worth a try.” Abby finished her last suture and pulled the bloodied gloves off her hands. She examined the IV bag and asked for an antibiotic addition. The nurse left as Carter finished his last suture. He tossed the blood soaked gauzes and bandages into the red trash can and pulled off his gloves. He gazed down at the girl on the gurney and smiled at Abby’s gentle movements as she adjusted the sheet covering her and checked the IVs. She used her stethoscope again and then noticed him watching her. She smiled.
“You are a damn good doctor, Abby,” he said softly. The nurse entered and handed Abby a small IV bag with antibiotics. She hung the bag and added the line to the saline drip that was already there. Carter ordered the dressings for the girl’s wounds and the two of them walked out of the curtained area. Carter reached over and draped an arm across her shoulders. He drew her closer and leaned in to kiss her. Abby cringed slightly and slipped away from him carefully.
“Don’t...do that again...please,” she said. Carter dropped his arms to his sides and stared after her as she crossed her arms across her chest and walked away from him.
Abby headed back to the courtyard to see if her clothes were dry. The sun was so hot that it shouldn’t take too long. She pulled her khaki slacks and cami off the line and folded them. Her thoughts were racing. Damn him. She wasn’t leaving without Luka and Carter was making it very difficult for her to be around him.
She changed into her clothes and tossed the bloodied scrubs into the hospital’s laundry basket. Damn him. As if she didn’t have enough to be worried about...thinking about right now. Where was Luka? She didn’t know how much longer she would be able to hold on here. Abby took a deep breath and tried to settle her troubled thoughts. He was fine. She felt he was fine. She knew he was fine. It was just a matter of time before he’d be back. The question was, how much time?
She wandered out the gate of the courtyard and into the teeming camp. There was a parade coming down the road in front of the hospital. A tribal dance of some sort with a crowd of people behind it. Abby stepped up onto a rock to see and smiled as she watched the cascade of colorful robes and head dresses pass by. Her eyes scanned the crowd of faces. This camp was in the depths of despair and they still found a way to celebrate. It spoke volumes about the human spirit. Then her heart leaped to her throat and her head began to pound.
She saw him before he saw her. Luka was climbing out of a jeep that was dropping him off at the end of the crowd of people that were following the dancers. Abby stepped off the rock and carefully made her way through the crowd moving in the opposite direction. When the crowd had gone she was standing alone on the packed road. She stood still with her arms crossed across her chest waiting for him to see her. He looked up and grinned. Abby started walking quickly toward him and then began to run. Tears were streaming down her cheeks as she came closer and slowed down.
“Where the hell have you been?” she said.
“Looking for you...” he shrugged with a smile. “We left the compass at home.”
She sighed heavily and moved into his arms. Luka wrapped his arms around her and held her close. She lifted her face to his and he grinned as he bent his head to kiss her. She was safe again. He was back.
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Post by loopyallie on Apr 10, 2006 18:45:25 GMT 10
Aaaah this is a wonderful and beautifully written story, so absorbing as that it feels that I am actually there getting the feeling of Africa... You are a very talented writer larue... >:(you say you are a teacher, are you an English teacher?
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