helen
Luby Lover
Posts: 88
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Post by helen on Aug 23, 2007 11:10:39 GMT 10
I've grown up in a family full of single moms so I understand how hard it can be. Some of their situations are a lot worse than Abby's right now, and they are not boozing it up. I guess I just don't understand the nature of an alcoholic. Maybe this storyline will open my eyes to some things. I think you should take your own advice here! Others have said earlier that alcoholism is a disease, so I'm not going to repeat it. But I think you need to open your eyes as to what this addiction is about, because you're being very judgmental - good on your family members who had a tough time without resorting to drink or other drugs, but don't be so dismissive of those who can't. But having a couple of drinks every now and then if one is not an alcoholic does not make one a bad mother, person or whatever! I groaned when I read the word 'hangover' in the sides - but it was almost to be expected, and I'm looking forward to seeing MT's work on this.
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jen
Luby Lover
the only thing better than hairspray
Posts: 65
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Post by jen on Aug 23, 2007 11:35:08 GMT 10
But having a couple of drinks every now and then if one is not an alcoholic does not make one a bad mother, person or whatever! Um....I never said that. So I don't know where you getting that from. I think it's fine for people who don't have alcohol problems to have drinks some times. It's even fine for them to get drunk at times if they want to. Abby does have an alcohol problem though and it would be easy for her drinking to get out of control.
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helen
Luby Lover
Posts: 88
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Post by helen on Aug 23, 2007 11:53:06 GMT 10
I wasn't referring to your post.
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Post by larue on Aug 24, 2007 2:25:35 GMT 10
Yes...I seriously DID type those sentences out. I didn't want the surgery either but I always tend to look on the bright side of things. And adoption is easy....when you take one step at a time. The hardest part is making the decision that it is the way you want to build your family. After that....anything else is a cinch. We have done it twice.
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Post by larue on Aug 25, 2007 0:29:09 GMT 10
Did something happen to the response that I was replying to in the above??? It appears to have been removed.
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alaeangelorum
Duchess of Luby
Geeks make the world go round
Posts: 329
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Post by alaeangelorum on Aug 25, 2007 3:08:17 GMT 10
Did something happen to the response that I was replying to in the above??? It appears to have been removed. You posted something twice (it showed up above and below Helen's post) I think, but it's not there twice now, it's just above her post. Is that what you mean?
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Post by viviclooney on Aug 25, 2007 11:41:30 GMT 10
I'm lost... What do you all mean? **Viviana**
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Post by daniella on Aug 25, 2007 12:46:47 GMT 10
I think that she meant the post was doubled and the moderator deleted it... she was explaining why...
Dani
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Post by larue on Aug 27, 2007 21:45:11 GMT 10
No...someone had asked if I seriously wrote those sentences in referrring to a surgery that women did NOT want and making adoption seem so...simple??? It's not there now. I should probably delete my postings....
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cloudy
Duchess of Luby
Posts: 337
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Post by cloudy on Sept 1, 2007 2:11:36 GMT 10
Larue, I was just referring to the whole crisis with Joe and not knowing whether he was going to make it, and also the hysterectomy she had. That was very hard on her physically and emotionally. IMO things were worse for her then than they are now. I give much respect to all the single moms out there also. My mom raised me and my sister by herself, and it was definitely not easy. I've grown up in a family full of single moms so I understand how hard it can be. Some of their situations are a lot worse than Abby's right now, and they are not boozing it up. It's not like Luka has deserted her for good. He IS coming back. He should be able to go and take care of his father without worrying about Abby hitting the sauce back home. I thought that the writers had written her as way stronger than this. I guess I just don't understand the nature of an alcoholic. Maybe this storyline will open my eyes to some things. Yea, seems like you don't understand the nature of an alcoholic. Just remember Abby is an alcoholic, whether recovering or relapsing, she is definately at a greater risk of using ETOH when she is troubled or stressed as opposed to the single mothers you know. Alcoholism and substance abuse are psychological and physiological disorders which are most likely hereditary and just in ppl's genes. They most likely have had some kind of history of a psychological disorder in the family, i.e. Bipolarism for Abby. Not to say that every mother who has depression, schizophrenia, or some other disease will bare alcoholics. Also, even though they still have the power to make better decisions, there is judt an increased risk. It can also just be the type of personality and temperament a person is born with. So I hope this calrifies a bit, and it's not that Abby isn't a strong person, maybe the ppl you know are just "normal" in the chemical balances in the brain department.
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Post by annita on Sept 1, 2007 2:30:43 GMT 10
You are correct and to add, ppl must realize that alcoholism is a disease, not a defect of character. Fortunately it's a disease that can be controlled, much like diabetes, provided that the alcoholic avoids certain types of triggers ... some of the very basic triggers are being hungry, angry, lonely or tired (HALT).
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jen
Luby Lover
the only thing better than hairspray
Posts: 65
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Post by jen on Sept 1, 2007 5:20:47 GMT 10
I appreciate your input cloudy(and yours, lubylove2). I may not like this storyline any better but I do feel like I am understanding more of Abby's mindset. I don't have much experience with alcoholism, so I do admit that maybe I was judging Abby too harshly. I still wish the writers didn't choose to have her fall off the wagon though.
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Post by daniella on Sept 1, 2007 5:55:39 GMT 10
You are correct and to add, ppl must realize that alcoholism is a disease, not a defect of character. Fortunately it's a disease that can be controlled, much like diabetes, provided that the alcoholic avoids certain types of triggers ... some of the very basic triggers are being hungry, angry, lonely or tired (HALT). It's somewhat different from the diseases we know... For a person to decide to be an alcoholic, the person has to drink... it's not like a person who has diabetes, who never wanted to became ill in the first place... I'll believe that alcoholism is a desease, but it's likedrug adiction and tobacco adiction, not a desease that may be inherited... And by saying that this make Abby weak, it's not her at all, but it's her will that came so far ( like I said, even Luka drank beer in front of her and she goes to bars and other a club soda or something without alcohol... ) and then relapse... Dani
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cloudy
Duchess of Luby
Posts: 337
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Post by cloudy on Sept 1, 2007 6:23:50 GMT 10
It's somewhat different from the diseases we know... For a person to decide to be an alcoholic, the person has to drink... it's not like a person who has diabetes, who never wanted to became ill in the first place...
I'll believe that alcoholism is a desease, but it's likedrug adiction and tobacco adiction, not a desease that may be inherited...
And by saying that this make Abby weak, it's not her at all, but it's her will that came so far ( like I said, even Luka drank beer in front of her and she goes to bars and other a club soda or something without alcohol... ) and then relapse...
Dani[/quote]
Of course you can believe what you want, but I think you're wrong. Any type of substance abuse is a psychological disease and can be inherited like I mentioned before. I'm a nurse practitioner, so I read a lot of research and theory that's out there. And you do have a point that people still choose to do something, but in relation to the comparison of someone with Diabetes, both diseases can be passed on, and ppl with Type II diabetes can also control their decisions and lifestyles much like an alcoholic as to whether they want to improve or worsen their condition, it's not like they didn't ask to have type II Diabetes. If you're overweight, have a family history, lack exercise, smoke.....etc, you are basically asking for it.
It's all about the right triggers that will cause someone to relapse, or get some kind of disease.
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Post by daniella on Sept 1, 2007 8:04:21 GMT 10
I agree that diabetes wasn't the best example... but i don't agree that alcoholism is inheritednor is drug adiction or cigarette adiction )... like. my father smokes more than two cigarettes a day ( I can say it's an adiction ) and because of that I have to smoke too ( wich isn't truth, because I hate cigarettes ) ?
I know that for a big majority here, is like this, but you can control it... like Abby did...
Dani
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