Ok, here we are. This is last chapter.
Thanks to everyone who read my story and a big special thanks to everyone wgo commented it.
Hope you'll enjoy this last part.
EPILOGUE
There’s no movement and, for the first time, he’s perfectly satisfied about the situation. To be honest, he is the first who doesn’t want to move, almost afraid to shift. He tries to ignore the soreness in his neck muscles, worried that a simple movement can change what he has been admiring for about an hour into something tragic.
Perfect and enchanted image, which fills his heart with joy. Everything he needs is there, in front of his eyes. All other things are completely senseless.
But, suddenly, there’s a movement and it’s not that bad. In fact it’s better, so much better.
Shuddering eyelids, curving lips. Brown eyes into his.
Immediate recognition. Relief. Smile.
“You’re back…”
“Yeah…”, his voice is more stable now. And he thought he have lost it.
“I was scared”, the admission is difficult to her. She has never been used to speak freely about her feelings.
“I know. I was scared too”. He stopped, pensive. Admitting to have been scared is too much, he still can’t try to reach the heart of the matter. What was he really scared of? Of Vukovar? Of the past? Of that grave? Of himself? Maybe it was a mix of all those things, but by now it’s all over. Vukovar, the beautiful and enchanted and charming town seems only a distant point, a macabre yet sweet story to be told to children to put them to sleep. Vukovar. The name, like a wind gust, unwraps into his mind. Vukovar.
“Aren’t you coming to bed?”
“I think someone is already occupying my place…”, he’s smiling while answering her. His place occupied by the only person he can tolerate to see there, the only person who has the right to stay there. Joe, his son. His beloved son. His future.
“He missed you… he didn’t want to sleep in his crib”, Abby’s tone is cautious, she’s implying other things. Luka knows it, not only Joe missed him, but Abby, too, missed him. And maybe she too didn’t want to sleep alone anymore. What would have happened if…?
They fall silent for a while. Words have never been so important to them. They only need a sight, a gesture.
“Are you hungry?”
“No… I think that what I need most is my bed”, and the people who are lying on it, of course.
“We can make room for you”, a tender smile. She can’t wait to have him again at her side, she needs to hold him again, to lose herself into his scent. Delicately, with a movement that only mothers are able to do, Abby moves Joe against her hip. Baby’s little head whirls just a little and from his lips comes a little snort. Disapproval. Babies don’t like to be awaken during sleep. Luka and Abby stares at him for a while, ready to calm him. But nothing happens. Joe curls onto Abby and goes on sleeping.
Luka gets up from the armchair he was seated on and starts to undress. At first the coat and then he bends to unlace the shoes. Abby observes him carefully, fixing firmly the precise movements of her man’s muscles, when…
“But, what…?”, her voice is alarmed. She’s mentally blaming herself: why hasn’t she noticed earlier?
“It’s nothing…”, he’s walking next to her in order to open the closet. She grabs his right wrist and lets her fingers move across the sling. He closes his eyes.
“Does it hurt?”
“No more”, and he’s sincere. Abby’s soft fingers are like a soothing balm. The hand stops throbbing. It’s in peace now. Like him, like him.
She smiles at him, relieved in a sense. He’s there again, alive, there’ll be more time later for explanations. She’ll be able to wait for the day he’ll decide he’ll be ready to open up. And he’ll explain the reason why he left so suddenly, she knows. But now she doesn’t want to think at it. Luka is home.
“Let me help you”
He sits on the bed near her letting her take control. Her hands are softly working his shirt buttons, making him think for a while at the huge effort made to button them up, pushing the garment down after a moment. She starts stroking his shoulders and then his arms and then his abdomen, caressing slightly his scar. Luka bends placing his head onto the nape of her neck. How much he missed her skin! He doesn’t dare to move, enjoying Abby’s hands on his hair and back drawing lovingly the profile of every single vertebra, as if she was claiming the property of his body.
“You lost weight”
“I know”. His warm voice against her neck makes her shiver.
“Don’t worry, I’ll cook for you”
She can feel him laughing. She takes his face into her hands and obliges him to look into her eye. Forehead against forehead, nose against nose: “Are you laughing at my cooking skills?”
“I’d do it, if there was something to laugh at…”
Silence. They’re still staring at each other. Luka’s eyes are glistering with tears. Abby kisses his temple and then passes at his lips.
At first it’s a feather-like kiss, as if she needed to remember what kissing him was like, as if she was kissing him for the very first time. Luka doesn’t react immediately, he just stays still, enjoying her soft pecks so full of affection and love, but when she deepens the kiss he’s eager to respond. They kiss for a long time, their tongues duelling and Abby’s hand in his hair. And it’s so beautiful to discover one another again, as if nothing else in the world existed.
Luka is the one who ends it.
“Thank you”
She kisses him again, this time on the cheekbone.
“Tired?”
“Completely drained”
“Let’s sleep, then. Though in a while Joe’s going to wake up”
“I can’t wait…”
Luka has moved, and now he’s lying next to the baby. He kisses his head. Joe makes a funny yet sweet face. Luka smiles. His son. “I adore you, baby”
He shifts and encircled all his family with his left hand. It’s over, it really is. He has only one thing to do now: living the present. He closes his eyes and an image appears: Danijela, Jasna and Marko are smiling at him, free. Then, finally, after a very long time, a deep, dreamless and resting sleep wraps him. It’s over, it really is.