|
Post by Lubyfanatic316 on Jul 4, 2006 23:49:42 GMT 10
Great update!
|
|
|
Post by erprincess on Jul 6, 2006 6:09:35 GMT 10
Long update-oy.
“Hey, Luka how is she? “ I had to leave the trauma room, I felt nauseas, like had I had to throw up or something even though I could only be two to three weeks pregnant tops- I knew it couldn’t be morning sickness already, I just wasn’t feeling well. There was this weird tension around me and Luka. I needed to tell him but I couldn’t do it.
“She’s okay, there calling phyc, Abby- she tried to kill herself.” “ I know- With vicadin, It’s all my fault” “ Abby, c'mon- this is not your fault and she’s going to be fine” “ I told her everything was going to be okay- and they weren’t” He was trying to read me, like it was as if he knew something was wrong and I was trying to hide it. This couldn’t be good. “ Abby- what is it?” “What bothering you?” “Nothing- I’m fine” “I can tell something is wrong” I was trying to push him away. Some how I couldn’t “I just want us to be honest with each other Abby” “Yes- we should be honest with each other” I repeated “Okay, Abby, if you want to talk, I’m here” I loved how Luka did that- he always made me feel like I was the most important thing in his life- Like I was the center of his Universe- I loved it.
“So...Lauren.. she's gonna be okay?” I asked trying to change the subject “She took a lot of vicadin, when you left in middle we had to tube her, when she wakes u I’ll take it out or do you want to do it?” “Umm... can you do it?” “Sure.. but I think you would be the best one to talk to her” “Yeah.. I’ll talk to her” “Abby, want to go out tonight?” I was so not in the mood. I still had a huge headache. “Can I take a rain check?” I asked smiling “ I was hoping you would say that.. I am so beat” We kissed, right out in the middle of the hall, we did not care- it was a great feeling. It was soon interrupted by the sound of Lukas's pager going off. It was Lauren- she had woke up and needed her tube taken out. I followed behind Luka.
“Hi .Lauren...” Luka said to her cheerfully She had a really scared look in her eyes “This is Dr. Luka Kovak.....he is going to take your tube out now” She reached for my arm as if to say “ I want you to do it” “I am scared” “Lauren, I am gonna sit right next to you, I’m not going any were” She settled down, Luka took the tube out, then left because he was called for another trauma. I put a mask on Lauren to help her breath. She started to get up. "No, Lauren, just relax, relax" “I’m so.... sorry.....Abby” She tried to say “Lauren.. try not to talk.. Ashlee is at a babysitter, she's be over by the hospital soon.” I smiled at her. “Thanks. Abby....I didn’t mean to do this...I would never...” She started to cry. The way she was breathing interrupted her tears. “Lauren.. you need to keep your mask on” She took deep breaths from her mask. I needed to let her rest “Lauren.. I’ll come by alter to check on you.. maybe tomorrow okay?” I asked her “K” She replied. I smiled at her then I walked out of the room. I was off in five minutes. All that was on my mind was Luka. That's all I could think about. And the fact that I was pregnant. I wasnt sure how this would turn out. I was hoping for a miricale. Yay that was long that should keep everyone happy for a while. yay I love comments so please reply!
|
|
|
Post by Noora on Jul 7, 2006 21:25:08 GMT 10
Love the new update! (And your avatars!)
|
|
|
Post by Lubyfanatic316 on Jul 7, 2006 23:31:46 GMT 10
Great update!
|
|
|
Post by Maryna on Jul 10, 2006 1:49:42 GMT 10
update soon
|
|
|
Post by erprincess on Jul 11, 2006 4:20:17 GMT 10
Hey guys. Please tell me if I should keep updating, I need to know. Thanks!
It's been three weeks. I'm 4 weeks pregnant. That's right- I am one month pregnant. I still haven't told him yet. I can't I still have no idiea why,the words can't come out of my mouth. I can't hide this lie forever. I need to tell him. Lauren's been doing fine- Her husband came back home and She is now working in County. Things are good for her, I wish I can say the same thing about my situation. I can't though. I need to stop hiding from him. Luka will be home any minute now. Should I tell him? When we had that talk about not hiding from each other really is making me feel really guilty. I am screaming inside- i have no where to turn. This is it. He's walking in the door- he is my chance- to clear my head. I decided that I was going to tell him. In this moment. Nothing can stop me now.
"Hey Abby, How was your shift?" "It was good, but I so tired, I was waiting up for you" "Thanks. maybe tomorrow we could go out or something?" "Great... that would be great" " See any interesting patients today?” “No...not really. you?” “Well, One patient- a 10 year old girl came in... an hour later she coded” He had a sad look in his eyes. “What happened?” “She was sick- I don’t know...” His voice trailed off “That really made me think about children..ya know.. He said “What do you mean?” I asked him. “I want to wait to have children... when mine died. I promised myself I could never love any other child again...today that totally changed. I was so connected to that girl...I couldn't let her go..... He had a sad look on his face. A face I haven’t seen in a while.
I was totally silent.. He was trying to send me a message- he wanted more children but not yet- he still was mourning for his children-from Croatia- a life that was his so long ago. H e wanted to take his time with me- plan our future, if there was any at all carefully. I was shocked- I can‘t tell him yet. I had tears in my eyes as I put my hand to my stomach.
“Is everything okay Abby?” “Yeah.. everything is fine...just fine”
|
|
|
Post by hollygirl on Jul 11, 2006 8:09:04 GMT 10
noooo!! you have to update again soon!!! poor Abby, I hope she tells Luka about the baby.and that he is happy about it.! Update soooooooooooooooooooon
|
|
|
Post by Maryna on Jul 11, 2006 18:53:09 GMT 10
I have the same opinion like xlovelessx'
|
|
|
Post by erprincess on Jul 13, 2006 2:11:44 GMT 10
Update!
After having that conversation with Luka last night, I knew I couldn’t tell him yet. I knew I was going to either tell him or get an abortion- I couldn’t do either at this point- an abortion? would I want that again? NO- I couldn’t put my self through that. I am going to tell him when the time is perfect. Now, all I have to tell is Susan- I can trust her. She would never tell any one I can trust her, she is my best friend.
Making sure Luka was out of sight, I called to her.
“Susan, do you have a minute?” She was in middle of a minor patient. “Okay lets get a an x-ray of that leg and some Demerol for the pain.” “Sure, Susan..” Sam replied “What’s up Abby?” “Can I talk with you? In private?” “Sure. let's go outside wanna a coffee?” I smiled at her. She has no idea what I am about to tell her “Sure” She walked out side in to Doc Magoos we sat at a table and talked.
“Abby is everything okay? You seem like you have been distracted lately” “That is what I want to talk to you about” “Sure...Shoot” “Okay...Susan I am just going to come out and say it...I’m pregnant” I blurted “What? Are you serious? With Luka?” I gave her one of my classic looks like “DUH!” “....Yeah, with Luka” I kind of smiled for a second then I got serious “How far along are you? “4-5 weeks tops” “Please tell me you told him” I was silent I Didn’t know what to say to her “Abby...... “Susan first I was scared to tell him, then when I finally tried to tell him, He gave this talk about his own children in Croatia and how he wanted to wait until the time was right..” “Abby...Luka is in love with you and you know it....so what if things are a little backwards? Who really cares? Luka will be so happy Abby....He loves children and would be thrilled to share them with you” “Susan...Thanks” I was gushing , I had a new found confidence to tell him. Then both of our pagers went off- at the same time- there was a trauma coming in.
|
|
|
Post by <3 LubyII <3 on Jul 13, 2006 2:58:55 GMT 10
Great update! Post more soon!!
|
|
|
Post by hollygirl on Jul 13, 2006 3:19:15 GMT 10
great update! I have to know if Abby will tell Luka....... please post more!
|
|
|
Post by erprincess on Jul 13, 2006 5:39:23 GMT 10
I was so tired after that double trauma came in. I just wanted to sleep. I was feeling a little nauseous, which reminded me that it was time to tell Luka. I was dreading each moment as I heard him opening the door.
"Abby, I have really great news!" "Me too! You go first." This was finally my chance to tell Luka. "I’m going back to Croatia! I just got a call from Danijela’s mother. She wants me to come over as soon as possible. I didn’t even know if she was still alive after the war." I was totally crushed No way was I telling him. I was a little upset that he would be going away. "That's....that’s...” The words just aren’t coming. "Oh, don’t worry it will only be for two weeks at the most. I’ll be back before you know it." I was deep down truly happy for him. As soon as he comes back, I’ll plan a surprise party for Luka and invite everyone from County. Then I’ll tell him…and everyone else. If I can just hold off telling him for two more weeks, then I’ll be eight weeks pregnant! That’s what I’ll do, I tell myself. That’s what I’ll do.
Luka is leaving tomorow. I've been thinking about my plan of telling Luka, I am not so sure of myself. I have not really figured out a way of telling him yet. I guess I have two weeks to really figure it out. Maybe Susan can help me- yeah- she is good at these kind of things- Luka is packing for croatia now.. I'm trying to help him...I'm kind of having second thought about this whole trip...but Luka seems happy..really happy.
"Could you pass me that suit case?" "Sure...How long will you be away again? I asked him "Two weeks...are you okay with me going?" "Yeah..just.. I'm going to miss you" He stood up and we kissed- I really truly loved him "Ill be back before you know it" "Thanks.." He continued packing.. him flight was leaving tommorow- he was really leaving-for two weeks- I don't know- should I tell him? No- I'll wait...I know I can.
The next day at the air port....
"I love you so much Abby" I couldn't even say it....I so badly wanted to tell him.. but I couldn't. I couldn't even tell him I loved him. I am lying directly into his face.. all becuase I am scared. "Flight 118 is now bording... I started to cry. That was his flight "Abby..it's gonna be okay... "I love you.... We kissed- he awlked away.. he waved good bye.. he was gone
|
|
|
Post by Maryna on Jul 13, 2006 6:27:07 GMT 10
i beg you don't transform it in a unhappy story!!! and updaaaate soooooon!!
|
|
|
Post by Lubyfanatic316 on Jul 13, 2006 8:21:06 GMT 10
Great update!
|
|
|
Post by ERFanRach on Jul 13, 2006 8:39:40 GMT 10
Please make this a happy story.
|
|