She's back. - The end -

[strizzy]

Still so sad, yet so intriguing at the same time

[bostongirl]

strizzy said:

Still so sad, yet so intriguing at the same time

Thank you so much!! I really apriciatte your comments cause your words are meaningfull! So thank you!!

[bostongirl]

Sorry for my lack of updates but it takes me a lot to continue this fanfic....maybe someday soon when I'm doing a bit better.

[jadestar]

take all the time you need, I hope you feel better soon - BIG HUG from me

[bostongirl]

Ok a new update......it's not the best but it's something....sorry!


A month later..

It’s been 3weeks since I left Luka and Susen, I haven’t heard a single word of them. I just hope they are fine.

“Mom? Can you wash this for me?” Abigail asks me while she hands over a filthy jeans. “Sure. When do you need it?” I ask her. “Uhm. In a few moments. I want to wear it to Mandy her party.” She say when she’s playing with her hair. “You know I can’t clean this in a hour. This will take the whole afternoon! You need to wear an other pair of jeans hun.” “But mom this is my favourite!” She sighs. “Well you had to come with it earlier Abigail. Come on pick another one. You’ve more then one.” I tell her. “Right.” And she storms away.

‘Tomorrow it’s her birthday. Abby would have turned 36 this year she could have been a bright young mom and a real good friend. She could have had a great husband and such a sweet daughter, I know she had both of them but it’s different now she’s not among us.’

“Abigail hurry up! You’re late.” I yell upstairs, she’s always late. “I’m coming.” And she’s right cause I hear her stumbling down the stairs taking her famous turn jump at the bottom of it. “You’re going to break something if you don’t stop doing that. Come one get your present and get your butt in the car.” I say when she passes me and gives me her smile. I wish she had known Abby a bit better so she would understand why we called her Abigail. It’s not because we liked the name that’s what she assumed.

“Dad picks you up at nine don’t forget that. If he’s late call the hospital and ask for..” I don’t get a change to finish my line. “I know mom. If he’s not on time I need to call the hospital and ask for you. That’s the thousand time you’re telling me this. I know the drill.” She looks at me with that look she has. It’s hers. “Have fun. Bye!” I say to her when she already closed the door.

‘Abby, I wish you could have been here with us. You’re missing so much right now. You’re little girl has been trough so much pain, she blamed herself you know that. I know your in peace now but god if you were still here it could be so perfect.’

“Hey Susan welcome back!” It’s Neela who’s standing in the ambulance bay, probably waiting for MVA. “Hey Neela. How are you?” I ask her. “I’m fine. How about you?” She looks at me, she knows what happened at Luka’s. “Yeah I’m fine I guess.” I look away from her to avoid questions about it, she really don’t need to know. “So did you heard about Susen?” I hold my breath and think of the worst scenario. “No I haven’t heard a word since then. What’s going on?” Now Neela looks away avoiding my eyes. “I’ll tell you later. I’m on a break in half an hour, I’ll meet you in the lounge ok?” The ambulance she has been waiting for arrives and the conversation is closed.

‘Abby what the hell is going on back there in New-York? Can you help me to figure this out before Neela is going to tell it? God Abby just let me know Susen is doing fine! She needs to be fine Abby you understand that don’t you?’

I haven’t started my daily shift. I’m just sitting in the lounge waiting for Neela. 29 Minutes have passed. God why is time ticking so slow?

The door opens and Neela walks in. “Tell me Neela.” I say to her, not even giving her a change to grab her coffee. “You’re sure?” She says. I don’t like the tone of her voice, it makes me shiver. “I’m sure.” I stand up and pace around the room.

“Susan please sit down.” Neela tells me. “Right.” I take the seat next to her. “Child-services took her away from Luka.” She blurs out in an second. “They did what?” I yell. “Yeah. I found out when I called the house. The maid answered and when I asked for her she told me.” She takes my hand and I let out a deep breath. “I need to get her. She’s so vulnerable. She can’t handle this Neela. I need to get her. Abby asked me took look after her.” I start crying and Neela does the same. “You should Susan. I’m going with you. You can’t do this on your own.” Neela says after a couple of minutes. “What about Luka?” In a split second my thought are with him. “I don’t know. I called the hospital several times but he doesn’t answer my messages. He must been in so much pain.” Neela says. And I can’t do much more then just cry. Cry for all the pain they both have been trough this year.

‘Abby I’ll make sure she’s fine. I promise you! I’ll look after Susen, don’t worry.’

[bostongirl]

Wonders if it's that bad..........tell me...

[jadestar]

no it's not bad, just sad and heartbreaking to see Abby's little girl and Susan... OMG

[strizzy]

No it's not bad, just really, really sad

[Mitsi1819]

Yeah it really is.... But please continue, I'm wondering how it will end...

[bostongirl]

I'm really sorry!!!!!

‘Someone to remember.’

We arrived in New-York early this morning, the sun was rising and birds started singing. We stopped by at the house but no-one opened. After that we went to the hospital too find out Luka was fired 2 months ago and that they never have seen him again. Weird goes when I was with them he was at work, well that was what he told me.

Right now, we are sitting in a restaurant taking a coffee and a sandwich. Finding out what to do next. “The police station?” Neela says. “Could give it a try. I don’t know.” I say her. “Hang on Susan, we’ll find her.” Neela says back and grabs my hand.
I lost it on our way down. It was too much, Abby her birthday, running away again from home, leaving Abigail it’s just too much. But what else can I do then find her and take her home. She asked me too watch over her so I will. Abigail will understand it later, when she’s old enough. Then back at Abby, how the hell could she do this to Susen. The poor girl is all alone out there, by herself without her mom or dad.

“Susan? Come on.” Neela wakes me up and we go.
“Can I help you?” The desk clerk asks. “I hope so. We are looking for a girl named Susen Kovac. Child services took her away from her father. I need to see her.” I say to her. “And your name is?” She asks. “Dr. Susan Lewis. I promised her mom to watch over her.” I tell the woman. “Right. Dr. Lewis if you take a seat over there one of my colleagues will be right with you.” She says when she point at a bench in the corner of the police station. “Thanks you.” And I walk over to Neela.

“Dr. Lewis?” The Police officer says. We stand up and walk over to him. “You can call me Susan. This is Neela, a friend of mine. Do you now anything about her?” I ask when we follow him to his office. “Yes but I want you to tell it in private.” He says and opens a door. “Take a seat ladies.” So we do. “Ok. It’s about Susen Lockhart?” He says. I frown my fore-head. “Susen Kovac you mean?” I ask him. “No, Susen Lockhart. That’s how she’s called on her birth certificate. Daughter of Abigail Lockhart and Luka Kovac. Both parents died.” He reads from a piece of paper. My breathing stop for a minute. “No..her father is still alive.” I say and look at Neela. She’s pale. “Dr. Lewis I think there is something I need to tell you. Dr. Kovac died a week ago in a car accident. That’s the reason why his daughter is in foster-care.” He tells us.

The police officer gave us the address and we are on our way there. We both cried for Luka his dead. It’s weird to find out he died a week ago. Poor Susen, an orphan. “Susan this is it.” Neela says when she stops the car in front of an old building. “Neela whatever it takes she going home with us. She needs someone to be there for her who knows her. I need to be that person that will look after her the rest of her life.” I say to Neela. “I know Susan. We will take her home.” She puts an arm on my shoulder and I feel she will be there for me.

Neela did the talking at with the people of the orphan house. After an hour we can see Susen.
I follow the woman with a rock in the bottom of my stomach. “You can go in.” The woman says.

I knock on the door. “Susen?” “Aunt Susan?” I hear her say. My heart misses a beat. I open the door and there she is. Sitting on her bed, knees up and her hair filthy. Filthy clothes, she smells and looks skinny. “Hunny. I love you so much.” I say to her and grab her. “Daddy. Aunt Susan he, he died. I’ve nobody.” She cries. “I know Susen. You’re not alone. I’m here. You’re coming with me.” I caress her, hold her, let her cry and it’s good.

[luby2534]

Oh my god i cant believe you killed Luka too.

I'm an emotional wreck today. !!!

[strizzy]

Poor, poor Susen. Both parents dead...so sad...

[jadestar]

[bostongirl]

I know it's way too long for a chapter but I really couldn't stop writing. First I had a writers block and right now I'm writing like a maniac.
But enjoy!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As years pass by.
Years have passed and unfulfilled things to do are fulfilled by now. Like helping Susen trough the troubles she had, reminding her that Abby and Luka were both great parents, giving her a stabile life, solid ground but most of all the love she needs.
And here we are today.

Graduation day of both girls.
Susen passed her high school diploma and has been accepted to a good university right here in Chicago, Abigail on the other hand passed and is accepted at Harvard law school.
Both girls are smart and have their own plans to fill their lives. Susen wants to become a social worker, I think that’s due to the splitted family she has been growing up at. Abigail always dreamed of being a doctor, just like you mom she always said, But she wasn’t excepted cause she didn’t pass her science so now she wants to become a lawyer to make justice.


“Susen are you ready?” I yell from downstairs. “I’ll be down in a sec aunt Susan.” She yells back. How older she gets how more she starts to look like her mom. Her hair, smile, way of walking almost everything she does she does it the same. Only the colour of her hair is from Luka dark, really dark with those light hazel eyes.

“Mom can you help me with this?” Abigail asks when I see she doesn’t fit in her jeans. “Gail you really should be more careful of what your eating.” I say when I close the button and she holds her breath. “I know mom but I’m not blessed with size 6 like Susen. She has your name but not your body.” Abigail lectures me. Abigail looks exactly like me, her brother on the other hand looks like his dad.

“I’m ready!” Susen yells when she’s running down the stairs. “Stop it right there young lady. Let me take a look at you.” I say and search her with my eyes from tip till toe. “Beautiful.” And I give her a kiss. “Thanks. Gail? Your so not going to wear that jeans! Where the hell is that dress we bought?” Susen says when she sees Abigail.
“I’m not going to wear it. I’m too fat! I can’t even close the zipper of my jeans without my moms help!” She says almost in tears.
“Come one were going to my room and dress you. You’ll look beautiful in that dress. I promise!” Susen says and takes Abigail her hand. Together they walk up. “Hurry girls or we will be late.” I yell before I hear the door shot.


It took them almost half an hour but it was worth every minute waiting. Abigail does look beautiful in her dress and Susen made work of her hair. “O girls I can’t stand it that both of you are leaving the house after the summer.” I say when I hold them. “Don’t cry mom don’t want to ruin my dress with your mascara.” Abigail says and laughs.

“Thanks aunt Susan for everything you’ve done for me.” Susen says when she looks at me. God poor girl don’t look at me like that. “Don’t thank me Susen. I wouldn’t have missed one day of it. And it’s no goodbye you’ll be home on holidays.” I tell her when I press two hands on her head. “But it will be different when I turn 18 next month. Then your not legally my parent any longer and I’ll be one of the state again.” She says while she swallows away the tears.
Abigail looks at me with those same eyes, they have been talking about this together. “No Susen you’ll be ours always. Don’t forget that!” I tell her and grab them both.
“Mom we need to go. Dad is already waiting in the car.” Micheal says, my 13 year old son. “Right. Come on girls.” And we leave the house.


The ceremony was nice but due to the rain not beautiful. After the class picture we headed home with the five of us to have dinner.

I’m doing the dishes when Susen enters the kitchen. “Hey you.” I say when I turn my head and look at her. “Hey. Can I ask something?” She says and turn on her heels. “Sure. Pop the question.” And I make one step away from the kitchen sink to be closer to her. “Well can I visit mom?” She asks, shivering her voice.
“Sure, you know you don’t have to ask that. So what is it you really want to ask?” I say to her and strike her hair.
“Could I visit dad as well? I know a plain ticket is to expensive so I could drive to New-York. Maybe Gail wants to join me.” She has thought it out. “You can visit your dad but I’m going with you. And were not going to drive we’ll fly.” I tell her, I don’t want her going alone with Abigail. I know their close but this is something I have to do with her. “Right. Well that’s fine. That’s it. Thanks.” And she turns around and walks away.


I sigh, it’s hard to be remembered to them like this. Normally we don’t talk about her parents we just think about them, a lot. When she first arrived here she was almost 11 and I just found out that I was pregnant again. It was a couple of weeks after Luka his horrible accident. She was not talking, just gazing straight. Within months she started to talk again but not one single word about what happened and not a word about both her parents till today.


Even on birthdays or Christmas she never mentioned them, never visit their graves, never asked a thing about them and never looked at the photo album I made for her. But now she’s asking about visiting their graves, calling them mom and dad. I hope it’s not a sign for something bad but a sign for closure.


“Mom?” It’s Micheal who interrupts me. “Yes?” I say to him. “What’s going on with Susen. She was crying in her bedroom. And when I asked she said I shouldn’t bother her.” He says to me with a disappointed look in his eyes. “It’s nothing Micheal. Is she still up?” I ask him. “Think so. She shot the door when I left her.” He says while opens the fridge. “No coke for you Micheal. Water. Tell your dad I’m with Susen will you. And start making your homework.” I tell him and leave him alone in the kitchen.


“Susen can I come in?” I ask when I’m standing in front of her bedroom door. “Sure the door is open, like always.” She answers. I enter the room and see it’s almost empty, only her bed and nightstand are still in it. Suitcase are gathered next to the door.

“So what’s going on here?” I say to her when I take place next to her on the bed. “I can’t stay. You’ve done enough to help me and I can stand on my own feet now. Next week I’m turning 18 and then the house will be mine. So I’m moving back to New York and going to live in my old house and find some work.” She says when she looks me straight in the eye.

“No. You’re going to university. The house will be yours when you’ve graduated from university and then you can find work and live there. And I know you can stand on your own feet. Although your turning 18 next week this is not going to happen. I’m still your guardian, legally your adoptive mom.” I tell her.
“But I’ve my own rights.” “No you don’t. When you turn 21 you’ve your own rights. This is America not Europe. Unpack those suitcases right now Susen. And put your stuff back in the room.” I say with this angry tone in my voice and walk away and shut the door behind me.


“What’s going on up there?” Chuck asks me when I enter the living room. “Susen. She packed her belongings and moved everything out of her room and decided to go back to New York and live in the old house, on her own!” I yell at him. “Calm down Susan. I can’t help it baby. I’m sure you talked it out of her head.” He says and hugs me.
“I don’t know Chuck. All of the sudden she’s talking about them, calling them mom and dad and wanting to visit their graves. What the hell happened?” I ask him.
“Nothing happened Susan but she graduated and from every kid in her class their parents were there and she was on her own. Maybe she’s beginning to think about them because she’s starting to build up her life and starting to have boyfriends and her first kiss and her first you know..” Chuck says, trying to comfort me. “Maybe.” I say back and let myself collapse in his arms.


“Mom, dad I’m out!” I hear Abigail yell when she passes the living room. “Stop it Gail and come in.” Chuck says. The door opens and there she stands our daughter. “What are you going to do?” Chuck asks her. “I’m going to have a drink with a guy from school.” She says and I see her blushing. “With a guy?” Chuck repeats. “Yes dad. A guy! He’s really cute.” She says. “Well do we know this guy? And did your mom talked to you about you know.” He says to her and I can’t help it to laugh. “O dad why do you always have to do this when I’m close to leaving. His name is Bratt and you know him he’s the boy who helped me with my math. And yeah mom gave me the lecture.” She tells her dad.
“Good. Back at 12 Gail and not one minute later.” He says when Abigail is already at the front door. “She didn’t hear that last part Chuck.” I say and smile. “I know.” And he stands up to walk after her but I hold him. “Don’t.” I say and kiss him.


It’s 2 in the morning and Abigail isn’t back yet. I said to Chuck that I would stay awake and that he could go to bed. A wise decision cause if he finds out she’s this late she would be grounded for life. I know where she is, there is this party tonight organized by her class at school so she’s safe and warm but still I hope she will be home soon.

I see the light turns on in the hallway and hope it’s her but it’s not Abigail it’s Susen. “Aunt Susan I’m sorry for what happened tonight.” She says and I see she has been crying. “Come here hunny. It’s ok.” And I hold her in my arms, safe and warm. “I just miss them on those days when they supposed to be there and be proud. I miss them when I’m celebrating my birthday, with Christmas, New-Years eve and on all those other days. I’m not complaining cause you’ve been like a mom for me and Chuck like a dad and Abigail and Micheal like siblings but I just miss them.” She spreads out.
“I know Susen. I miss them too.” Then we both hear stumbling in the hallway and a minute later Abigail her face turning around the corner. “Sorry I know I’m too late but I had so much fun.” She says. “It’s ok Gail. Go to bed and try not to wake your dad.” I say and wink at her. “Thanks mom.” With the word mom Susen starts crying louder and Abigail walks over to us. “O Susen I’m so sorry. I love you babe.” And she holds her friend. “You can’t help it.” Susen says and they both start laughing. “I really don’t get the two of you together. Really.” I say and shake my head. “You don’t even want to know what Gail just said.” Susen says and Abigail starts blushing. “O god no. What?” I ask them both. “It’s nothing mom.” Abigail says.
“Tell me or I’ll wake your dad.” I say. “Right you win.” She says and looks at Susen. “Abigail lost her virginity!” Susen screams. “Ssh or you will wake my dad!” Abigail exclaims. “You what? See that are things parents don’t want to know of their kids.” I tell them. “O god mom. You didn’t told me how good it was.” She says and glows.

“Don’t Abs!” I say and then I want to swallow it back. I stopped calling her Abs since Susen arrived just to make sure she wouldn’t be reminded of that name all the time. “Mom?” Abigail says when she sees the look on my face. “Party is over girls. Go to bed.” We hear Chuck his voice say. We start laughing and he turns out the lights.

[Rach :)]

i just cought up on this fic i love it